I can do all things ... III. Courage, Wisdom, Peace

There is a famous and wonderful prayer attributed to Reinhold Niebuhr which has been adopted by many twelve-step programs. It is “God, grant me the serenity (peace) to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference” (the word in brackets is mine).

I said last day that we need to learn to stop fighting the people and circumstances God allows in our lives. We need to stop stressing over things we can do nothing about. One of the things I had to learn the hard way was that I am the only one I can change. Trying to change others simply does not work. In marriage you might try to change your spouse, but if you do more likely than not, you will just finish up with a resentful partner (or worse without one). We can guide our children for sure, but we cannot make decisions for them. As much as we would like to, we cannot make decisions for other people. The old saying is true “you can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make him drink!”

I am not saying there is no room for persistence, for endurance and stick-to-itiveness. This is a big part of the Christian life. William Wilberforce's life long battle for the abolition of slavery, is a fine example of courage and determination and it inspires us to enter into our own destiny (see the 2006 movie Amazing Grace). It is however the nature of life that there are some things we cannot change. We may fight and rage and stress and obsess over things, being like the dog with the proverbial bone. We do such things to our own harm (see for example “Don't get mad ...”). As I write we are finding ourselves dealing with the aftermath of two young ladies known to us, who were hit by a drunk driver. Severely injured these two young women have amazed us by the Grace they are displaying as they deal with their injuries, and for one her long term recovery. With every right to be angry and even bitter, we are challenged and inspired by the peace and even joy they are showing in the midst of it all. We see Jesus in their radiant countenances, in their acceptance and grace.

At some level it is all very logical. I mean what is the use railing about something you cannot change? The reality though, it that it is easier said than done to maintain positive attitude in the face of intense pain, tragedy and injustice. It's not fair, and its no use pretending that it is. It's easy to say “get over it”, but we need (I need) God's help and mercy, many times to let go. We need to pray “God grant me the serenity, the peace I need to accept those things I cannot change”. Paul in the context of the title verse of this series of posts, points us to a process that will help us. In Philippians chapter 4:4-7, Paul outlines this as choosing to rejoice, being gentle to all, choosing to be thankful, bringing our concerns and and requests to God in prayer. I have memorized these verses, and work them as progressive steps, and then work them again until I experience the peace promised in verse 7 starts to take root in my heart. Then I work it again until the peace reaches that level that it is incomprehensible to the world (verse 7b). It is incomprehensible because while it is not logical, it is real, and it brings Glory to the God who makes it all possible. I can do this for “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me”. You can do it too, and I (and I believe He) invites you to enter into this peace that passes all understanding, that keeps our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7 again).

If you are like me, letting go will be a process. There are still times that I think I can change others. Have you ever thought “If only they would listen to me?” But you will not get through to one who does not want to hear no matter how good you are with words! There is a lot of it about (deaf ears - see Jeremiah 5:21). Of course we all seem to be sensible and wise and more than reasonable in our own eyes (Isaiah 5:21). But when we have tried and tried and tried at something and got nowhere, it is wise to ask God if He is wanting us to let go. The saying “Let go and let God” has a lot of wisdom many times! It is not easy, accepting what we cannot change, but we give ammunition to the enemy when we don't or won't (John 10:10a). We need to learn to give no place to the Devil (Ephesians 4:27), and not letting go when we need to, does give him place. It gives him a foothold into our hearts, a foot hold that can easily turn into a stronghold!

But this is just half of the equation. We are called to step outside the box, out of our comfort levels. It has been said that faith is spelt r-i-s-k. We are called to victory, to be in transformation (Romans 12:1,2), to enter into fullness of life and fruitfulness and fulfillment. I hear many people say that if you expect nothing, then you will not be disappointed, and from what I can tell, they seem to live boring or pain filled lives. But is this any way to live, and is it really living? In Christ life is intended to be an adventure. He will lead us into the unknown, and will give us the courage to do what He calls us to do if we ask Him. We ask ourselves “But what if I fail?” We do need to count the cost, but God will not lead us to do anything that He will not equip us to do. So we pray “God give me the courage to change the things in me and in my World that You are calling me to change”.

But how will I know what is of Him and what is of self? It's all in the “serenity prayer”, so we need to pray “Lord show me the difference between my wishful thinking and Your will and plan and purpose for my life.” And let's make no mistake about it, He does have plans for our lives, and they are good plans, plans with a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11). Jesus came that we might have life and life in all its fullness (John 10:10b). This is my inheritance my birthright. How hard would you fight for your in inheritance if someone left you a million dollars? This inheritance is worth a lot more than that! We need to show the same determination in the spiritual arena as we would in the natural!

Its a good prayer, this serenity prayer, and I invite you to pray it now and to mean it “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference”.