Whoever's words define you, that person is your god. Cornerstone IV continued.

There is an old saying “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me”. It is a lie! Words spoken, especially by those who play a big part in our lives, can undermine us and leave us feeling paralyzed or without hope. Sometimes we ourselves are the worst offenders, as we engage over and over in negative self talk.

The Scriptures tell us that “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit” (Proverbs 18:21). Eugene Peterson in the Message paraphrases this verse as “Words kill, words give life; they're either poison or fruit―you choose”. There is much insight in Peterson's understanding of this verse. First of all, words have a very powerful affect on what we do. As it says in Proverbs “As he thinks in his heart so he is” (Proverbs 23:7). We saw an example last day, of how negative “tapes” that play continually in our mind lead to a vicious cycle, but it is much deeper than that example. The words we allow can empower us or drag us down. So what words are we to allow? Though the Lord will, from time to time need to rebuke us (Revelation 3:19), His Words are always redemptive, that is with the ultimate purpose of building us up. So other than Words He speaks to bring us back on track, discerning His Words from Satan's (often spoken though others, even Christians) is not rocket science. God's Words build us up, Satan's words tare us down. The second thing in Peterson's paraphrase has to do with our choice. We will say more abut this later.

Lets go a little deeper in the way that words affect us, the words that we hear, the words that we believe, the words that we accept as true. Lets look at some partial truths: The Truth is that it hurts when someone important to you:
• Lets you down
• Speaks ill of you
• Tells you you are no good (just like your no good father)
• Tells you you are a failure, that you are a blankety blank, etc.
• Misunderstands you (negatively)
• Tells you one way or another, that you don't count
• Jumps to wrong conclusions about who you are
• Falsely accuses you
• Treats you as if you are nothing (disrespects you, treats you with contempt).

The truth is that these things can undermine you, and likely will if you let them! The Truth is that the more important the people are who speak these things into your life, the more it affects you. The truth is whoever's words you allow to define you, that person is your god.

Before we go further let's unpack the last statement. When I say that person is our god, I am talking about trusting in what that person thinks and says about us. It is about receiving the negative opinion of that person, taking them into our innermost being, and living our lives out of these “truths”. We can even tell ourselves that we have rejected what the person says, but still be radically affected by them (see “I will never be like my dad. Never!” July 2010). Receiving what that person's thinks about us in this way, is to allow that person to define who we are, to believe and act as if that what person says is true. That person can even be ourselves. How many of us have negative opinions about ourselves?

Now lets turn this round. What if the most important person in your life
• Never lets you down
• Always speaks well of you
• Tells you “you can do this”
• Tells you that you can do anything you set your mind to
• Understands you deeply, always gives the benefit of the doubt.
• Tells you are precious, valuable.
• Never jumps to conclusions about who you are
• Never condemns, is always ready to hear your side of the story
• Treats you as if you were Royalty
• Chooses to forgive and forget admitted faults

The truth is that these things can build you up, and will if you handle them God's way! The Truth is that the more important the ONE who says things like this to you the more potentially it can affect you! The truth is whoever's words you allow to define you, that person is your god. The Truth is that for the sake of health and sanity, that person needs to be God!

Bill Johnson has a wonderful saying “I cannot afford to have a single thought in my head that is not in His (God's)”. The Truth is that the only opinion that really matters is God's. And the thoughts He has for us are like the above “thoughts for good and not for evil (Jeremiah 29:11). We are precious in His sight, we are valuable, we are His, He will be with us in trials and difficulties (Isaiah 43: 1-4). He rejoices over us with singing, He quiets us with His love (Zephaniah 3:17). He will never leave us not forsake us (Hebrews 13:5). He is the healer of our broken hearts (Isaiah 61:1). There is more, there is so much more for us to seek out in His presence and from the treasures of His Word.

The Truth is that if “god as you understand him” is not like the One in list above, then you have an idol in place of God. I am convinced that all of us have some false beliefs about God, about ourselves and about others. More often than not, we will not be aware of these things. I mean if we knew we were believing a lie we would surely cease to believe it. Actually its not that easy, but if we are hearing Him, He will lead us into all truth (John 15:26). More to come about hearing.