Therefore a man shall leave …. and hold fast to his wife (2)

In a perfect world the leaving of our parents would be perfect as would be the holding fast to our spouse. But we do not live in a perfect world. You may have noticed! But certainly the more we are able to separate from our parents in a healthy way, the more we will be able to hold fast to our spouse in a healthy way. But in any case, the healthy part requires work. It is not automatic.

I am more and more convinced that for Christians who are or were married, that that marriage or divorce is the primary tool that God wants to use to make us more like Christ. So for example Paul tells us that those who marry will have trouble in the flesh, and that he would spare us that trouble (1 Corinthians 7:28). But he also tells us that the furnace of the trials, tribulations and difficulties that we encounter in life are intended to build character (Romans 5:1-4). This same passage tell us that when we fully submit to this character polishing (verse 2), then the hope and love we so desperately need to continue to submit, are poured into our hearts by the Holy Spirit (verses 4 and 5).

So how does this work? The scriptures show us the default when we do not “rejoice in tribulation” (Romans 5:2 again). In particular when things went wrong between Adam and Eve, Adam immediately blamed both Eve and God (Genesis 3:12). So it starts with taking responsibility for our part in what went wrong. This may involve coming out of denial that we are blameless! And what I want to say this morning, is that when we have not completed the hard work of working through to a heathy separation from our parents, we more than likely bring any residual conflict into our present situation. And this will make holding fast more than a little difficult. For those of us who are divorced, we also need to work on our part in obeying the command “As much as is possible with you, to live at peace with all” (Romans 12:18).

Father, we need (I need) an abundance of Grace to respond in the way You want us to respond to any of the troubles, trials and tribulations of life. Thank You that when we choose to throw ourselves on Your Mercy, that Grace and Peace are multiplied to us (2 Peter 1:2). Thank You that in this way all things are possible in You (Philippians 4:13) in Jesus Name Amen

Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother… (1)

For a very long time I have been fascinated, by the connection between the wisdom of the ancient Scriptures, and secular psychology. It started years ago after hearing a psychologist talk about the common difficulty of finding a healthy separation between parents and their married offspring. And the importance of the Biblical order leaving, clinging to the wife, and becoming one flesh in this verse from Genesis 2:24 suddenly struck me.

The talk outlined various unhealthy separations. Perhaps no one, from the parents side, has the absolute correct balance between letting go on the one hand, and of abandoning their child on the other. I remember one minister talking about in-laws that become outlaws! But the difficulty is two-sided, and it is more than possible for the children to physically leave, but still be emotionally tied to the parents. This can happen through rebellion or unforgiveness. In such cases the parents live rent free in the mind of their child. You know what I mean, I am talking about situations where the very thought of the parent triggers anger or obsessive thinking.

I remember hearing that six months after your marriage, your attitude to your spouse will mirror your attitude to the parent you are most closely tied to emotionally for either good or bad. What I am saying, is that in order to have a healthy marriage, there is a need to do the often difficult work of ensuring that there is a healthy separation between offspring and parents. This is not automatically solved even when the parents have died! As part of this, while we do need to honour our parents (Exodus 20:12), we need, at the same time, to have healthy boundaries. It starts, with acknowledging there is work to be done, and it needs to start with me. I am the only one I can change!

Father, thank You for the wisdom of the ancient Scriptures. I have observed, and I am sure it’s true that anything from secular psychology that works, can be found either as a Biblical command, or a Biblical principle. It is also my observation Father, that much of the church has failed to avail itself of the Biblical pathways (recovery) to the abundant life (Exodus 20:6). But when we do Lord, I am convinced that the world will run to us (Isaiah 55:5; Psalm 51:13). Open our eyes Father that we may behold wonderful things out of your law, and we will give You all the honour and glory and praise in Jesus Name Amen

A full plate, or a cup running over

The word picture in the title of this post, is intended to contrast a life burdened and preoccupied with a multitude of problems, with a life of abundance of provision, energy peace and grace. I meet people all the time those plates overflow with trials and tribulations, and as a consequence whose cup is not running over. For many the only time the cup runs over is, to coin a phrase from the musical Oklahoma, “when everything’s going their way!”

The phrase “my cup runs over,” is of course taken from Psalm 23, the Shepherd's psalm. When the Lord is your Shepherd (verse 1), even when your plate is full, even when you walk through the valley of the shadow of death, you have the resources not only to come through without fear, not only to survive such a threat, but to come through with your cup overflowing with peace and joy and assurance (verse 5).

In talking about this with a dear friend who has a very full plate and is struggling greatly, we essentially discussed the need to cooperate with the Shepherd as He leads us to the still waters of time spent with Him (verse 2), and of feeding from nourishment in the green pastures of His Word (also verse 2). And I was caused to remember again the hard learned lesson, that we do not know that God is all we need until God is all we have.

Father, I want to thank You this morning that You have promised never to leave us nor forsake us, and that we need to learn to understand that a full plate is a crossroads. We either allow ourselves to be offended, or we allow You to draw us close to obtain fresh grace. Help me this morning Lord, and those reading this post, to always choose the latter course. And we will give You all the honour, glory and praise in Jesus Name Amen

You died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God

It’s no wonder unbelievers think we are crazy! Here in this verse from Colossians 3:3 Paul tells us that we are dead, while at the same time saying we are alive! But perhaps the point is that heavenly realities are so “other” than earthly realities, that only by coming at them from different angles can we even begin to understand. But what I want to say first this morning, is that behind all of this is the fact that heavenly realities are so much more real than earthly realities. In particular earthly realities are only temporary, but heavenly realities are eternal (2 Corinthians 4:18).

The second thing that I want to say, is that there can be no resurrection without a death! And at some point in true conversion, we will need to come to the end of ourselves, to the end of our self life, our selfishness. In particular our self-centredness needs to die. In Romans 8:13 we read “If through the power of the Spirit you put to death the deeds of your sinful nature, you will live.” Indeed this is the first step in appropriating the power of His resurrection in our lives (Philippians 3:10). We cannot live the Christian life without this!

But what does it mean that all life is hidden in Christ, or that we are seated with Christ in heavenly places (Ephesians 2:6)? The first part of the verse quoted above from 2 Corinthians 4 says “We fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen.” The point is that the abundant life promised in the here and now (John 10:10b), and the rewards in the hereafter, these things depend heavily on our attention, our focus and manner of life being based on the reality of the unseen things of the Spirit.

Father, Peter after declaring that the visible heavens and earth will pass away with fervent heat asks what kind of people we need to be (2 Peter 3:10, 11). Paul tells us that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us (Romans 8:18). So I ask you this morning Father to help me to do my part in putting to death the deeds and the desires of my sinful nature, so that I may truly live both in the here and now, and in the glory of what is to come (Romans 8:13; Colossians 3:4). Thank You Father, that You delight to answer such prayers we ask in Jesus Name Amen

Praying always with all kinds of prayer and supplication in the Spirit Therefore stand 8

This partial quote of Ephesians 6:18 is not always acknowledged as being part of the armour of God, but it surely is! I know for sure, that in the midst of the battle I need to flee to the shelter of His embrace. The verse talks about both prayer and supplication, so it is about both intimacy with God and also about our requests. And perhaps first and foremost it is about making sure in prayer that all the armour is in place.

So we need to start with the Truth, Jesus told us “Man does not live by bread alone but by every Word that comes from the mouth of God (Matthew 4:4). We need physical food daily, and we need to make sure we feed daily from the truths of the Word. Also for example, it is no coincidence, that the helmet on salvation follows the breastplate of righteousness. Salvation is a gift received by faith. It cannot be earned. Feeling saved on the other hand is a very different question, and we are not likely to feel saved, and so have peace of mind, if we are not walking in the ways of righteousness.

In the verse we are looking at today, we are admonished to be watchful with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints. In particular, this part of the armour needs to anticipate the attacks before they happen. We need to surround our hearts, minds, souls and emotions by hedges of protection that can only be put in place through prayer. So the armour is not just about me, it’s about the kingdom, it’s about our fellowship, it’s about being diligent and persistent.

Father, the Scripture tells me that in many things we all fail (James 3:2). and I am very aware this morning of the inadequacy of my prayer life. Thank You Lord that You have given me prayer partners, and thank You that with Your help, prompted by Your Spirit, I am growing in this area. But I have not arrived, and I ask for Your ongoing help for myself and for anyone who wants to get in on this prayer this morning. And I give You all the honour and glory and praise in Jesus Name Amen

Take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God;Therefore stand 7

Though the sword, the Word is not the only weapon in the Christian’s arsenal, it is perhaps included in the armour, because it is used for both defensive and offensive purposes. We see Jesus using the sword when the devil tempts Him in the wilderness, shortly after He had received the incredible affirmation from God “You are my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased” (Mark 1:11). Satan comes at Him with “if you are the son of God… ( Matthew 4:?), tempting Him to question His identity. And Jesus come back at him again and again with the Word. Likewise Satan seeks to undermine our identity as sons and daughters of God. We needed to know, that we are sealed with the Holy Spirit (Ephesians 1:13), and we need to know however we are tempted, that God has already provided provided the way of escape (1 Corinthians 10:13).

Since as it is said, offense is the best form of defense, it seems appropriate to mention two offensive aspects of the sword the principles, and the promises of the Word. In terms of the principles David, for example declares “Your Word have I hid in my heart that I might not sin against You” (Psalm 119:11). Or again for example, James tells us that when we resist the devil he will flee from us (James 4: 7).

In terms of promises, Jesus tells us that if we continue in His Word, then we will know the Truth and the Truth will set us free (John 8:31, 32). Freedom is not automatic, we need to continue, be immersed in, abide in His Word. In particular, His Word strengthens us, encourages us, corrects us, shows us how to get back on track when we have fallen, and then it shows it’s how to stay on track (2 Timothy 3:16, 17). We never need to be estranged from God, because He has provided through the cross the means of reconciliation. He has promised that if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9).

Father I thank You this morning for these principles, promises and provisions in and through Your Word. It is through Your Word that I am able to appropriate your divine nature (2 Peter 1:?). It is through Your Word that I learned that You are my strong tower (Proverbs 18:10). It is through Your Word that I learn to take the whole of the armour of God, so that I can stand, stand and having done all stand! I praise and thank You this morning Lord for Your amazing, life-giving and life-sustaining Word in Jesus Name Amen

Take the helmet of salvation: Therefore stand 6 (Ephesians 6:17)

There is a reason that the law requires the wearing of a helmet for cyclists and skateboarders. It is that the head is so easily injured. Likewise the Roman helmet was worn to protect this most vulnerable part of the body. The helmet in this description of the various parts of the armour of God, is described as “of salvation.” And the very least of what this must mean, is that an essential part of our armour, an essential part of what enables us to stand, is knowing that we are saved, having the assurance of our salvation.

The Scripture tells us that the fear of death can keep us in lifelong bondage, but that it is his intention to release us from that (Hebrews 2:15). We are intended to know we are saved, intended to have this insurance. In 1 John 5:13 John writes “These things I have written to you who believe in the name of the Son of God, that you may know that you have eternal life.” Salvation is a gift, a gift cannot be earned. There is absolutely nothing you or I can do to earn our salvation. It is a gift that must be received by faith (Ephesians 2:8,9). The assurance of salvation, our feeling saved however is an entirely different matter.

When we are in a backslidden condition, part of the Lord’s discipline (Hebrews 12:6), is his withdrawal all the fullness of his Spirit. I am talking about the fullness here, not the full withdrawal of his Spirit. Indeed at salvation we were sealed by his Spirit when we believed (Ephesians 1:13). Scripture makes it clear that assurance, this witness that we are saved, only comes as we walk in his ways. We are not saved by works, but feeling saved, which is very different thing, comes as we walk in obedience (i.e 1 John 3:14; 2 Peter 1:10).

Lord Jesus I thank you so much for the assurance of salvation. Thank you that you told us “Amen, amen, I say to you, he who hears My Word and believes in Him who sent Me has everlasting life, and shall not come into judgment, but has passed from death into life.” it is strong stuff Lord! When I think about it, when I encounter trials and tribulation then the very worst thing that can happen is that I die. But then I get to be with You forever and ever Hallelujah! Indeed there are times when I cry with Paul that although living life in the here and now is all about you, nevertheless to die is better (Philippians 1:21). I ask you this morning Lord, to help me make the most of what You have called me to. I want to hear on that day “Well done good and faithful servant the the joy of your lord” (Matthew 25:21). In your precious Name Amen