Corner stone I. Healing soul/spirit hurts

For those of us who have been deeply wounded, there seem to be (at least) two distinct phases to our Christian walk. There are probably more, but I want to talk about two. The first, the one I will be dealing with in today's post, is what I call the intensive care stage. The second one (later posts) is what I call the physiotherapy stage.

In the very early stages of writing my book, I had this accident. Foolishly trying to rescue this runaway washing machine descending concrete steps, I held on, and was flipped right over the top to land on my right shoulder. It is a wonder I am still alive but the Lord had mercy upon me. As we would eventually confirm (by MRI), in addition to sever bruising I sustained a torn rotator cuff. The story of my healing is a story in itself, but what I want to say here, is that for some considerable time, my right arm was neigh on useless. I just needed some TLC - tender love and care, and rest. I could not play my guitar, I could not write properly. I could not write on the board at all. I tried writing on overheads, but it was difficult for my students. There were periods when I needed to keep my arm in a sling. I could not lift my grandchildren. Others had to do things for me, I could not shovel the snow, and I felt not just a little useless.

These wounds of course were physical and, possibly because people could understand this kind of pain, they were at least at some level, sympathetic and willing to make allowances for me. Now physical wounds are not the only wounds that can debilitate us, leaving us functioning way below our natural abilities. Emotional wounds that come from abuse or neglect especially in childhood, can affect us for life if not dealt with.

And we are all wounded at some level, often even more deeply that we even know ourselves. We are also often only dimly aware just how much these wounds affect the way live our lives. It never ceased to amaze me, at the time of my injury, how many vigorous handshakes and bone crushing sideways hugs I received, causing me not inconsiderable pain. I tried to be gracious at such times, for it was clear that no hurt was intended, but I am sure it affected my ability to be my usual cheerful self. If you have a sore thumb and someone brushes up against it, your response is more than likely to be much stronger than if your thumb is not sore. Likewise when we are “sore” emotionally, we are likely to react differently that if we had not been injured. I know one couple for whom sarcasm is the unforgivable sin, and they react strongly in condemnation if it slips out in their presence. I suspect that they were both deeply stung by it in childhood.

If you are lucky enough to have survived this far without some deep sense of loss or betrayal, without anger at how you have been dealt with, if you have received no gross unfairness, nor ever felt deeply misunderstood, if you have received no undeserved punishment, have always received the recognition due to you, have never suffered any form of abuse or neglect, then you will likely have no idea what I am talking about. On the other hand, just perhaps you can relate.

But what do we do with all our hurt? Well these things are crossroads. On the one hand, we can become bitter, and/or withdraw from life, or on the other hand we can allow these things to bring us to the Lord. He wants to use these things to draw us to Himself. In Matthew 11:28,29 He invites “Come unto Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls”. In John 14:27 He promises a peace that the world cannot know. As we read last days post, Jesus by quoting from Isaiah 61, tells us that He came to heal the broken hearted. He came to set us free from prisons of bitterness and the like, He came to comfort us in our mourning, to replace the ashes of our broken lives with the oil of His joy.

We are talking here about the tangible love of God, and about a love that heals. We are talking here about His presence in our lives, we are talking about intimacy with God. We are talking about His total total acceptance of ourselves made possible by “the blood of His cross” (Colossians 1:20). It is meant to heal us and to bring us into community with Him and each other. So we need to find and give this love and acceptance to each other in the community of the rescued, in the fellowship of the delivered. In particular, we need to be patient with each other, especially in the early stages of our emotional healing. We also need to be patient with ourselves! He is committed to our wholeness, but it will not happen over night. His intention is that the process will be the very thing that cements our relationship with Him and each other. This is His desire, this is His passion and His purpose in coming and dying four our sins and our weaknesses.

This then is the "intensive care" stage. He wants to take us deeper and further for sure, but we need time to convalesce, we need to learn to rest in His love. In this process of healing, we may need to be in emotional slings for a while, but we will never outgrow the need for His love and acceptance and comfort and grace and peace. You may have noticed that life is not without its ongoing battles! The good news though, is that He came that we might have life in all its fullness. He wants us to be overcomers, and to walk in victory. He sent the Holy Spirit to comfort and strengthen us. His plan is that in cooperation with Him, we rebuild our broken lives into something beautiful (Isaiah 61:3A), and to leave a legacy to those who come behind, to “repair the desolations of many generations” (Isaiah 61:4).