Are we there yet mummy?

To fully understand you would have to have been a parent who has driven on a long journey with a child. But it's not just children who want to cut to the chase. We were asking last day “Do you want to be made whole?” We were saying it is not such an obvious question as you might think. Our resistance to change is amazing even when we are well and truly stuck. It may be that the man by the pool of Bethesda needed all of the 38 years there, to come to the place where he did indeed want to be made whole (see John 5:2-6). Many of our prisons are of our own making. Such prisons include the prison of offenses, the unwillingness to let go of bitterness and resentment, prisons of shame as we hide from God, from each other and from ourselves. We are trapped by our need of the approval of others and we are paralyzed by fear. It is painful being stuck, but the fear of change is scarey too. There is a recovery saying that makes more sense than I want it to, it is this. “We will not change until the pain of being stuck becomes greater than the pain and fear of change.” Are we there yet mummy? Are you there yet, am I? I am asking if you (and I) are ready to start (or to continue) the hard work of becoming whole. The road to recovery, though it has many significant victories along the way, is a journey rather than a final destination.

John and Paula Sandford in their book “Transformation of the inner man” have some interesting things to say about this from a Biblical perspective. They say that we may have to fail over and over before can't stand not to die. In the book the context is of recovery from addictions, but it has much wider application, and the concept behind their saying is thoroughly Biblical. In talking about dying, they are not speaking about physical death, they are talking about the death of the self life. I have mentioned before a frequent prayer of mine that the Lord would put to death the deeds and the desires of the flesh (the fallen part of our human nature). Before I unpack this, let me put it a different way. When we give in to our wrong desires, we develop appetites that demand attention. It can of course be physical hunger, but I am speaking of a lot more that just eating disorders. The alcoholic has an insatiable appetite for booze, the pornoholic has an insatiable appetite for pornography. Then there are many not so obvious addictions such as gossip or anger or compulsive thoughts or the wearing of masks (hiding who we are out of fear of rejection). So the Sandford's point could be restated by saying we may need to fail multiple times until we are willing (by the Spirit) to starve these appetites to death or with the help of the Spirit to overcome the fear that paralyzes us.

The prayer mentioned above, is a combination of two scriptures. The first is Romans 8:13 “For if you live according to the flesh you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.” The life that is spoken about here, is the life in abundance that Jesus speaks of in John 10:10. The second scripture is from Galatians 5:22-24. In the first part, Paul is talking about the fruit of the Spirit love, joy, peace, long suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control. He goes on to say that those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Crucifixion is a painful death, and giving our passions and desires up to God can be painful too, but we will not be free until we do.

An important part of what I am wanting to say is that while we have a significant part to play, it is not in the end all up to us. In fact this is the biggest difference between Biblically based recovery and secular versions (see “Psychology without faith is lame” - August 12, 2010). That it is both, is seen in a single sentence in the Romans passage. Paul says both that it is you (you and I) who need to put to death the deeds of the flesh, and also that it is “by the Spirit”, that we do it. In other words there is a partnership here. When we are willing with His help to crucify (put to death) both the desires and the works of the flesh (Galatians 5:19-21), the Lord will cause the fruit mentioned above to manifest itself in our lives. The fruit tree does not have to strive to produce fruit. It comes from having its tap roots firmly rooted and grounded in good soil (speaking of the Word and intimacy with Him). The Lord wants to take away the things that hinder, and to give us life. But He will not violate our will, and He requires not only our permission, but our full cooperation. He knows what we are capable of, and what we are not, and when we do it His way, He will do for us what we cannot do for ourselves. To me this is good news, because I need (and have needed) a lot of help to get unstuck!

Reinhard Bonnke has a helpful story which illustrates our part in all of this. He tells of a young man who invited Jesus into the main “room” of his heart. It was a genuine invitation, but there were rooms that were still closed to the Lord. The Devil came knocking and completely defeated the young convert. “Why did you not help?” the convert asked the Lord. “You kept me out of certain rooms” the Lord replied. There was one “room” (area of his life) that the young believer knew for sure the Lord was talking about, and he surrendered that too. The Devil came again with the same result and the same question was asked. “Until you give me authority over the whole house, I can do nothing” the Lord replied. Finally the whole house was surrendered to him. The next time the Devil came knocking the Lord himself opened the door. “Sorry”, the Devil replied, “I came to the wrong house!” Bonnke's point is that until we surrender all, the house still belongs to us, and we are still running it! The Lord needs us to give the reins of our lives to Him.

There are a couple of verses in Philippians that come to mind here (2:12,13). In the Amplified version we read “.... work out (cultivate, carry out to the goal, and fully complete) your own salvation with reverence and awe and trembling (self-distrust, with serious caution, tenderness of conscience, watchfulness against temptation, timidly shrinking from whatever might offend God and discredit the name of Christ). [Not in your own strength] for it is God Who is all the while effectually at work in you [energizing and creating in you the power and desire], both to will and to work for His good pleasure and satisfaction and delight.

It is said that salvation has three aspects past present and future. The point in the past where we surrendered and came to the Lord “Just as I am” saves us from the penalty of sin. The Scriptures tells us “there is now therefor no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1). As to the present, we are being saved from the power of sin. It is a battle and a half. It is what Biblically based recovery is all about. “Half measures profited us nothing,” in order to overcome, we need to “present our bodies a living sacrifice” (Romans 12:1,2). This is the aspect of salvation that Paul is talking about in Philippians 2. Why fear and trembling? We too easily neglect such a great salvation (Hebrews 2:1). Finally as regards to the future aspect of salvation, we will be saved from the very presence of sin. In that place “God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away” (Revelation 21:4). Hallelujah! “And everyone who has this hope in Him purifies himself, just as He is pure” (1 John 3:3). Are we there yet mummy? Are you, am I?


Prayer: Father You tell us that in our double mindedness we cannot expect to receive anything from You. Many times Lord this is me. I ask You in the name of Jesus to put to death the deeds and the desires of the sinful nature. Please replace it with a deep hunger for You, for Your Word, Your Kingdom and for Yourself. I know that life in its fullness is found only in this. I know that I have a part to play, but I need Your help. Bring me out of denial into Your wonderful light. Please kill that part of me that does not want what You want for me. Give me both the emotional and intellectual components of the understanding that Your ways are not only good and right and proper, they are smart.