Take away guilt and shame I. Take away guilt

There are basically three responses to dealing with guilt or shame, but only one is effective. But before we start I want to say what I will mean by these terms, and what the differences are. As with many words in the English language there is not always common agreement on their meaning. For this reason I want to say what I will mean in this and the following post. Here are a couple of quotes from the internet "Guilt says I've done something wrong; shame says there is something wrong with me. Guilt says I've made a mistake; shame says I am a mistake. Guilt says what I did was not good; shame says I am no good." Using this terminology we should probably really call a 'guilt trip' a 'shame trip.'

I will deal with these two things separately starting with guilt. Of course the above quotes are from a secular source, where we are not anymore allowed to use the words “wrong” or “sin.” But let's look at an extreme case. Let's look at a Biblical hero, David. David was a murderer and an adulterer (aren’t you glad the Bible does not sugar coat it's heroes?). I hope we can agree that this is wrong, that this is sin! David gets Uriah the Hittite's wife Bath-sheba, pregnant. Then in order to deal with it, he gets his commanding general Joab to send Uriah into the thick of the battle, and to withdraw from him. Things go according to David's plan, and Uriah dies. Nathan, under direction from God confronts David who then repents (2 Samuel 11:1 – 12:24). We read about David's true repentance in Psalm 51, and there are a number of things we can learn about our subject from it.

So let's set this up. Does David saying “sorry” to Uriah make up for what he did, does it take away David's guilt? How can he do it anyway, Uriah is dead, so what would it even mean? David is feeling very very bad by this time. He tells God that his sin is ever before him (can't get it out of his mind), that it feels like his very bones have been crushed (Psalm 51:3, 8). So David is suffering from bone crushing guilt. This is not some guilt trip, what he did was very very wrong and he knows it (verse 3 again). But what is the solution? David knows that ultimately it is “Against You, and You only that I have I sinned and done what is evil in Your sight, so that You are proved right when You speak and justified when You judge” (verse 4). He is of course speaking to God. David asks God to blot out his transgression, cleans him from his sin and restore the joy of his salvation (verses 1,2, 9 and 12).

But God has a problem. He is just. Is it just to simply forgive? What would you say if my father was a judge here on earth, that I was brought before him and found guilty of some crime, but then he simply lets me off? Would he be just? We want God to be merciful yes, but I believe in the end we will want Him to be just too. Firstly if I am going to heaven I don't want any injustice there, secondly I want the Hitlers of this world to get what is coming to them. But no matter what we want, God cannot be unjust, in the same way He cannot lie, He cannot be anything other than Holy.

And the Law is very clear, it demands “life for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot” (Deuteronomy 19:21).” I have heard this described as barbaric. But in an age when feuds were the norm, this is advocating justice not revenge (which never seems to be satisfied). The problem was (and still is) that we are want to take two eyes for one eye and two teeth for one tooth. God is saying no, the punishment must be just, the punishment must fit the crime. David's sin was murder and adultery. What punishment fits these crimes? Justice demands life for life, and our God is a God of Justice (Isaiah 30:18). So here is the problem, how could God forgive David (and in the end you and me too) and still be just?

I said above that God cannot be anything but just, but he also cannot be anything other than loving. In the illustration above (of my father as a judge here on earth), what about if he declared me guilty, prescribed the just fine and then took off his robes, came down to where I was, and paid the fine for me? If he did that, he would be both just and merciful, and the just requirements of the Law would have been fulfilled. You might even say that love and justice had kissed (see Psalm 85:10). And in fact this is exactly what God has done in and through the sacrifice of Jesus on the Cross. In Romans 3:25,26 Paul tells us that God presented Christ as a sacrifice of atonement (at–one-ment – reconciling us to Himself), through the shedding of his blood …. He did it … so as to be just and the one who justifies (puts in right standing) those who have faith in Jesus (words in brackets mine). In 1 John 1:9 He goes even further telling us “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” So He is not only just to forgive us, He is just to cleanse us, to take away the feelings of defilement and worthlessness, in fact to take away all of what David tells us he was was feeling in Psalm 51. This of course may take some time.

By way of a practical aside here, in the context of confessing his sin, David tells us “When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long” (Psalm 32:3). In other words when he kept silent (not confessing) his bone crushing guilt remained with him. The relationship between confession and healing is made explicit in James 5:16 where we read “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” Note that it is in the context of fellowship ("one another"). I find it works best when I confess to someone who struggles with the same sin. It is important too, that the other person (or persons) be safe! It is not so healing when confidence is not kept :-).

So the just punishment for David was death, but Jesus took the just punishment on Himself. Of course this was not just for David. The Apostle Peter puts it this way “Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive by the Spirit” (1 Peter 3:18).

But some will object that David lived and sinned and died long before Jesus hung on the Cross for our sins. The Scriptures however, tell us that Jesus, who is the Lamb of God, was slain before the foundation of the world (Revelation 3:18). The point is that God operates outside of time. Paul tells us that both Abraham and David were saved by faith, just as we are (Romans 4:1-8). Paul is arguing that both Abraham and David (without knowing it was Jesus) were saved by faith in what God would (in their case) do in Jesus. The old Testaments sacrifices were mere pictures and shadows of the one and only truly effective sacrifice (Hebrews 10:1-10). Abraham and David looked forward, and we look back to what God accomplished in Christ. On that day all who are saved will know they are saved by Jesus, even if they did not know it at the time. These things should cause us to reexamine too narrow an understanding of John 14:6!

I am saying all this to say just that the only effective way to deal with our guilt is to to have it taken away as in “be forgiven.” The reason Jesus came was to make it possible for a Holy God to able forgive and still be just. In 1 John 3:5 we read “But you know that He appeared so that He might take away our sins.” If we deny our guilt, it is not taken away, it remains. If we ignore it or blame others, it is not taken away, it remains. And since God is the one who is most offended by our sin, it is His forgiveness that we need. But how does it work, what does the process of being forgiven look like?

The Romans 3 passage quoted above ends with “He did it … so as to be just and the one who justifies those who have faith in Jesus.” But what does “have faith in Jesus” mean? The, perhaps overly wordy Amplified Bible translates believe (or have faith) variously as “adhere to - cleave to, trust in and rely on”. It involves entering into a trusting relationship with Him, which includes repentance and turning from our sin. Repentance and forgiveness are clearly linked in the Scriptures (i.e. Luke 24:47). Repentance is necessary, Jesus is not a ticket to sin, and there are warnings about deliberate and presumptions sin (Hebrews 10:26). Paul speaks of the godly type of sorrow that brings repentance that in turn leads to salvation and which leaves no regret. He also tells us that worldly sorrow brings death (2 Corinthians 7:10). Worldly sorrow is of the “sorry I got caught” ilk. Godly sorrow is about determining not to do it again, and regretting that I did it in the first place. Repentance is changing my mind about sin, agreeing with God and turning my life over to Him. With this kind of repentant faith, our guilt is truly taken away.

So then it is the sacrifice of His Son that allows God to forgive us, and be put right with Him. And there is no other way, for “there is no other name under heaven given among men whereby we must be saved” (Acts 4:12). If we reject His forgiveness, we retain our guilt. He will not force us to receive His free pardon. The Bible tells us that the wages of sin is death. Wages are what you get for what you did. The full text of this quote from Romans 6:23 reads “the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Without Him we would ourselves need to pay the penalty for our sin (and all have sinned and fallen short of the Glory of God – Romans 3:23). We are not left without a solution, notice the “but.” “But the gift of God is eternal life.” God has provided the solution as a gift. We do not, and in fact we cannot, earn this gift. There is a divine exchange behind what Paul is saying here. Jesus takes our sin, and gives us His righteousness (2 Corinthians 5:21). And standing in His righteousness, we are being equipped for heaven. And it is because we stand in His righteousness (and not our own) that we can know that we have eternal life (Philippians 3:9; 1 John 5: 13). We do not have to wait to know in fear and trepidation until we die. To say it again, salvation is a gift (Ephesians 2:8,9). In the words of the Hymn writer I am “Ransomed, healed, restored forgiven, who like me His praise should sing!” I have received this gift. How about you. Have you received His gift of forgiveness and eternal life? Will you do it now if you have not?

Prayer: Father I confess that I have sinned against you, and am not worth to be called your son (daughter), but You have made me worthy in and through Your Son Jesus Christ. I turn from my sin, surrender and give the reins of my life to you. With Your help, I choose to follow You all the days of my life. I receive Your gift of forgiveness now. Thank You for Your unspeakable gift. In Jesus name (1 John 5:12).