I pour out my complaint II

The context of the Psalm we are looking at (142), is of David fleeing from King Saul who was seeking his life. David is alone and hiding in a cave. Perhaps it was dark, dank and dreary, no place you would choose to be. In verse 4 David speaks of being alone and isolated “I have no refuge, no one cares for my soul.” But between verses 4 and 5 something has happened, for in verse 5 he tells the Lord “You are my refuge, You are my portion”. Things change when we come to the Lord in our desperation, giving it all to Him and waiting on Him. It did for David, and it can for us too.

Some are reluctant to bring strong feelings to the Lord, but He can handle our anger and frustration. He is not surprised by our out of control emotions. He would that we came to Him angry even with Him, rather than stay away. And we all get angry with God at times, even if is makes no sense. Many who deny that God exists are simply angry with Him (it's just a variation of the silent treatment!). One friend refuses to admit he is angry with God because “its not logical”! We need to be honest with God, and we need to be honest with ourselves. These things are at the heart of any functional relationship. David knew that God requires “truth in the inward parts” (Psalm 51:6).

There are times when the Psalmist is brutally honest, and this gives us permission to be honest too. In the Psalms, we see real responses to real injustices, and to the trials, temptations and difficulties of life. There are times when the Psalmist feels abandoned by God, but still he comes to Him. In Psalm 13 for example David cries out “How long, Oh Lord? will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me?” We can paraphrase this is "God you don't love me and you don't care". Its not true of course, but that it what it felt like! Some of the Psalms express thoughts and desires that are clearly inappropriate, as they come from an honest but bitter heart. In Psalm 137:9 we read “Happy and blessed shall he be who takes and dashes your little ones against the rock!” Of course this is not something to copy for “Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord” (Romans 12:9 -see also Hebrews 12:15). The point I am making though is that we can be real with God. We know that bitterness is poison (Hebrews 12:15), but many times the pain and the injustices are so great that we need His help to get out from under it. We get that help as we come to Him, not by staying away. If we let Him, he will bring us back to the way we should go.

So then we can come to God sad, mad or bad. He is big enough to handle it. And when we come to Him, we come to one who is bigger and wiser and more powerful that we are. He has the answer we need (not necessarily the answer we want, but certainly the one we need!). He also has the ability to give us the wherewithal to do what needs to be done. When we come to God seeking His input and stay there wrestling things though with Him, then we will receive from Him what we need to get unstuck. There are two things here, we need to come, and we need to stay until faith returns and we are changed. The Psalms are a wonderful vehicle to help us in this regard.

In terms of simply coming, it is wise to stop before we even start, and ask Him both to help us and to meet us in our reading. Too often I just start reading, and I can do this without even acknowledging that He is there. It is relationship He is after and it is in intimate relationship that we will be healed.

In terms of not hurrying, like the rest of Scripture, the Palms should be thought of as concentrated Truth that needs to be “unzipped”. We should not expect to be able to speed read the Scriptures. It is far too easy to miss what is happening “between the lines”. Many of the Psalms are written as poetry, and need to be understood that way. In particular, as discussed above, the changes that took place between verses 4 and 5 (and 7) of Psalm 142 likely took some time. Neither God nor the Scriptures promise instant solutions or immediate relief. In fact it is His plan to use the trials of life to strengthen us, and put steel and integrity into our character. Peter puts it this way “Beloved, do not think it strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened to you” (1 Peter 4:12). He also tells us that “the God of all grace...., after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast” (1 Peter 5:10 NIV).

When we “dwell in the secret place of the Most High” (Psalm 91:1) a transformation begins to take place. For one thing, we see things differently, and we receive His comfort, strength and love, and He speaks His truth into our hearts. David did not record exactly what happened in his interaction with God, or how or what He spoke to him. But we do have his response. Over and over in the beginning of this or that Psalm he comes in desperate, but he exits declaring for example “The righteous shall surround me (no longer alone and isolated), For You shall deal bountifully with me.” (Psalm 142:7 NKJV– words in brackets mine). David is expressing his faith and assurance that God will do as He has always done, and David is resting in His goodness (verse 7 NIV).

God loves us to take a hold of Him in prayer. The Scriptures show us over and over how the saints of old did this. The words of Jacob in his hour of need come to mind as in fear for his life and for those he loves, he wrestles with the Lord. He tells Him “I will not let you go until you bless me” (Genesis 32:26). This is the very opposite of the instant solutions our society has come to expect/demand. Jacob was wresting the whole night. Indeed David tells us that it is in meditating on His Word “day and night” that we become like a tree planted by the waters (Psalm 1). Jesus tells us something very similar when He says that if we continue in His Word, we will know the truth and the truth will set us free (John 8:31 ff).

Note that the emphasis is on “staying” as we read words like dwell, abide and continue. His benefits are not for those who are not willing to do anything other than rush in and out of His presence. He is after relationship, we should be too, because it is in His presence, in intimacy with Him, in the secret place, where we find grace and peace and strength. In fact this is where we find that He is everything that we need. And we are changed. As I have said before, we even get to like ourselves. It starts with me pouring out my complaint, but it ends with life and health and peace even before the circumstances change.