Who told you you were naked?

We have been talking about shame. After Adam told the Lord that he was hiding because he was afraid because he was naked, the Lord asked him the above question (Genesis 3:11). You have to wonder if the implication of the question is that Adam did not realize he was naked before the fall. But knowing something of human nature, I think the more likely scenario, is that either Adam or Eve now saw that the other was naked and said in accusation “You are naked!” Have you ever heard, or had the kind of conversation where one person says to another something along the lines of “You’ve got a great big zit on the end of your nose!” And the other person turns round and says “You should worry, your face is just one great being zit!” What I am saying, is that many many times, the source of our shame it is something somebody “told us.”

God’s purpose in asking questions like this, it is not to shame or condemn, but rather to start the process of healing. I sense in this particular case, it was about identifying the source of shame, so that it could eventually be evaluated and dealt with. And I suspect that more often than not it is what we have been told, that is the precursor to our feeling shame. Here are some examples:- “You’re no good, you will never be any good, you’re just like your father (debilitating put downs)!” or “why don’t you just grow up (you’re so immature)!” or “you shouldn’t feel that way (your feelings are wrong)!” or “what you need to do buddy …(trying to fix you)” or “shame on you!” etc., etc.

It is important to learn to discern the difference between guilt and shame, since we need to handle them differently (see next day for guilt). It may not always be obvious, but in the end what lies behind shame is that lie that I am deficient is some way. And it is a lie. You see the reality is that I am who God says I am, not what others or even I myself think or say. And He says of those of us who are in Christ, that we are His brothers of Christ (Hebrews 2:11), and since there is no discrimination with God, then what He says to Christ He also says to us.And so what He says to us, is that we are His beloved sons and daughters, and that He is well pleased with us (Mark 1:11). We can see glimpses of this in families that are truly loving where the Father dotes on the son, and does not shame or reject him when he does wrong. And if we who are evil can do this how much better will our Father in heaven treats us (Matthew 7:11)?

Father, please help us to discern between guilt and shame, so that we may reject the underlying lie that we are somehow deficient. Lord I choose to believe this morning what You believe about me. And what You believe about me is put well in the words of the song by Godfrey Birtil to the effect that You think each and ever one of us is amazing. We need Your help here Lord to let this truly sink in. And so I pray the prayer for myself and all those who are reading this blog “I believe, help my unbelief in Jesus Name Amen”