If I knew then what I know now … Repentance without regret

If you have ever said (or thought) something like this, I have a verse for you (and for me) this morning. It is “Godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation without regret; but the sorrow of the world produces death” (2 Corinthians 7:10). And the first thing to say, is that if you are saying this, then you are growing in wisdom and that is a good thing. We do need to realize however, that this is something of a crossroads. In proportion to the seriousness of our pronouncement, one branch can lead to debilitating regret where we have great difficulty forgiving ourselves. When we travel down this road, we will likely beat ourselves up with out negative self talk. And our verse rightly describes this kind of “sorrow” as a form death. It is toxic regret, and whatever else it does, it does not bring life!

Another road is that of “godly sorrow (that) produces repentance leading to salvation without regret.” Now godly sorrow is still sorrow. What likely lies behind our pronouncement, is some sin, mistake, wrong doing or wrong response something that happened. Any all these tings likely had very negative and painful consequences. But godly sorrow here is not the sorrow that I got caught. Indeed, much of what we think of as being good is learned behaviour, that is out of self interest I would not do that again, because I don’t want the consequences! This is not goodness, it is being practical, but it is not repentance. Godly sorrow is the awakening realization that we need to choose the good, and turn from the bad, just because the good is good. Godly sorrow is the longing for righteousness, the beginning of wanting to do (and doing) things God’s way. It is the beginning of, and leads to, repentance.

Repentance is about wanting to do the moral good, just because it is good. Repentance is changing our mind and agreeing with God that His ways are best. It is turning to Him and choosing to love Him with all that we are and have. It is wanting to not do again what we did because, as all sin does, it comes between us and God. But godly sorrow is also realizing it was these very things that the Lord used to open our eyes to our need for Him, and to bring us to salvation. It is starting to learn that when I turn to Him, He uses even my sin for good (Romans 8:28), and that had these things not happened, I would not love Him today the way that I do. And in this sense there can be no regret because these were the very things that brought me salvation in the first place, and for things that happened after salvation, the things that drew me closer in the second.

Father, part of what it means to be made in Your image, is that no matter how far we have strayed, we still at some level love what You love (righteousness), and hate what You hate (injustice). And when You open up our blind eyes Lord to Your goodness through our godly sorrow, it does indeed lead us to repentance (Romans 2:4). And this is also why, when we return to You the Shepherd, the Guardian of our souls (1 Peter 2:25), it feels like our coming home. We do need to make appropriate amends Lord for the things we have done, but please help those of us Lord who are still having a hard time forgiving ourselves, to not get stuck in toxic regret, in Jesus Name Amen