The parable of marriage (I)

The meaning of some of the parables are far from obvious. But as the Scriptures say “It is the glory of God to conceal a matter, the glory of man to search it out” (Proverbs 25:2). And as His kings and queens,  He intends that we do just that. As the One through whom all things were created (John 1:3)), it seems to me that He actually designed creation to be parables, in and of themselves. What I want to do this morning, is to look at marriage as a parable. In Ephesians 5:32 in the midst of giving instructions on marriage Paul  says “This is a great mystery I speak concerning Christ and the church” What I believe we are being told here, is that it is God’s intention that when the world looks at the beauty of Christian marriages, it is intended to see the love that Christ has for His church. A love that caused Him,  at incredible cost , to give up His life for her.

Now it should be obvious, especially in the West, that we have utterly failed. In fact I myself have utterly failed being twice divorced. As I said t before, I believe marriage is a primary tool of God to make us more like Christ. And He intends this to happen even when we have failed. However, when a marriage fails, it seems that that one of two things tend to happen. Either a great deal is learnt as the person tries to figure his or her part in it all and then makes real and significant changes. Or not much is learnt at all, and the same unaddressed issues are taken into the next relationship. This last, is not what the Lord wants. Someone I respect deeply once told me “I never realized how selfish I am, until I got married.” There is much hope for a relationship like that, especially since I know they both feel that way.

What is happening in that marriage is that the couple is engaging in “as iron sharpens iron, so man sharpens man” (Proverbs 27:17). They are seeing, as we are all intended to see, that disagreements, conflicts and arguments among those with whom we are in significant relationships are crossroads. On the one hand,  we can cooperate with this iron sharpening iron process by coming in humility to the foot of the cross,  confessing our faults one to another and praying for one another (James 5:16 once again). This is healing. On the other hand,  if we do not confess to one another, we inevitably confess the other persons faults. It’s called the blame game,  it is not so healing, and it short-circuits our being transformed from one degree of glory to another (2 Corinthians 3:18).

Father, I cannot see that our relationships can be beautiful and attract the World like You intend, if we remain in denial about our issues, or do nothing about them. It’s not about being perfect Lord, if it were, none of us would make it. It is about being changed from our starting point. The “from glory to glory” can start in the gutter. It is progress not perfection that pleases You. Only Jesus was perfect. What I understand You expect of us is that we present our bodies as living sacrifices and cooperate with You in the transformation process. And when we do, we get to enter fullness of life and to glorify You. Thank You Lord for all that You are and do in Jesus Name Amen