Healing soul/spirit hurts V. Going deeper

There is so much more to be said about this important subject of healing of soul/spirit hurts. In particular about how the trinity of helps (Bible help, self help and God's help) plays out in this so so important part of our recovery. We need to continue in His Word to learn the truth (John 8:31), we need to do our part, and trust God that He is at work behind it all to help us “to will and to do His good pleasure” (Philippians 2:13). I started this series of posts by talking about the intensive care stage of recovery, and in many ways I have, in these last few posts, dealt with little more than this stage. It is an important stage, falling in love with Him and allowing Him to love us, learning to find rest and our security and our affirmation in His love, having our primary needs met in Him (Philippians 4:19). Getting there is a process, and even then it is not the end of the journey. In fact the extent to which we enter into all of this, is directly proportional to the way we pursue the things I will be discussing in the coming posts.

In an earlier post entitled “Do you want to be made whole?” (July 2010), I suggested that in the end many answer “no” to this question. Oh we, do want to be whole, but we may not want to pay the price. Many want a quick fix, and give up when things don't immediately fall into place (Mark 4:17). In other cases we just want to get rid of the pain, but we cannot get rid of the pain without dealing with the stuff that needs to be dealt with, the “garbage” that is attached to our lives. Dealing with that garbage inevitably spills over into our relationships, and they may even get worse for a while, some may even end! We may not be willing to push on through when the difficulties come. Becoming whole has a lot to do with establishing wise boundaries in our relationships (knowing when and how to say no without guilt, and knowing when to say yes – establishing personal space). We need to learn to speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15), but no matter how loving or how gentle we are, others may not want (or be ready) to hear. This is where is it so important to be able to rest in the love and the acceptance that He brings. His Love can bring the security we need to be able to stand firm when we need to. His Word and wise council can show us where to be firm and where to be flexible. Many times we need help. We need His help for sure and we may need the help of a councilor or the healing house ministries that are available in the body of Christ. It is not weakness to know our limitations. It takes courage to admit that we are stuck and need help!

I told at the beginning of this series of posts, of the accident I had with the washing machine. It was really sore for a long time, and for a while I just needed to nurse my shoulder and protect it from the “assaults” of those who wanted to vigorously shake my hand or give me those bone crushing sideways hugs. One of the problems of getting old, is that it is far too easy in situations like this, for the joints to stiffen up, and to loose substantial motion of the said joint. Lifting my arm above my head was painful, but knew that if I was going to get better, I needed to go to the Physio-Terrorist :-). You know “Does this hurt? Does that hurt? I felt like socking him on the jaw and asking him if that hurt him. You will be pleased to know that I restrained myself.

Since it was taking so long for my arm to heal, my Physio-Terrorist suggested that I have an MRI to determine if there was a tear in my rotator cuff. It turned out that “there is a significant tear” in it, and I was strongly advised that I needed surgery. I am not one who easily rejects the Doctors advice. However, I believe that in all these things it is the Lord who should have the last word, and I never felt that this advice was right. So I sought healing through prayer and exercise. What the exercise entailed was finding the right balance between pushing the envelope of pain, but not pushing it too far. If I pushed it too far, I would regress to an earlier stage and it would take too long to get back to the place I had been before pushed too hard. So I had to learn how much pain to endure before I stopped pushing the envelope. I started lifting weights with the first round being a can of beans (14 oz red Kidney beans, mm - beans), went on to three then to 5 lb dumbbells, and finally graduated with 10 lb dumbbells. I find that if I don't exercise regularly with this, I cannot do what needs to be done. I can if I am careful now, shovel snow (not too much - I do it in stages - but so far so good). I was told this and other things would not be possible, but I suspect that most give up far too easily!

As with the physical so with the spiritual. In particular “no pain, no gain” seems to be the operative phrase. Nobody is saying it is easy or without pain. Sometimes in the process of our healing the Lord needs to open up a wound we have been favouring, protecting from further pain by hiding or pretending that it does not hurt, or that we are nor really affected by it. We need to learn to take our troubles to the Lord, to cast all our cares upon Him, because He cares for us (1 Peter 5:7). We need to learn to “pour out our complaint” into His ear (Psalm 142:2), to let it all out, but not to get stuck there. We need to learn to discern the lies that we have believed about God about ourselves and about others. It is the truth that sets us free, and it is in continuing in His Word, in loving relationship with Him and with others in the body of Christ, that we learn the truths that we need in order to continue the process of becoming free (John 8:31ff).

We will often need help, the help of a pastor or a councilor. In the post mentioned above (Do you want to be made whole) I list a number of different ministries that I know of and trust, who can help us. When we get stuck (and we all get stuck at times) we may need to avail ourselves of such ministries in order to get unstuck.

To say it again, I am not saying any of this is easy, but what I am sure of, is that by following these Biblical principles, and staying in close relationship with Him and our fellow travelers, we will in the final analysis, be able to say that it is worth it all. Let me ask again the implied question “Do you want to be made whole, and are you willing to count and to pay the cost" (Luke 14:28ff)? May the Lord bless you, and give you the courage to change those things you can change, the serenity to accept those things you cannot, and the wisdom to know the difference (serenity prayer - see 17th March 2011). We will be talking about some of these difficult things in the coming posts.