Unity, disagreement and perspective

There are (at least) two phenomena that it seems to me,  are common to the human race. But perhaps I should speak for myself! If I dislike somebody, I find it quite hard to see their good points. And we are all mixture of good and bad, right and wrong. So the second thing is that if I disagree with somebody on a point that I feel strongly about, I find it hard to see any points of agreement. It might be a useful exercise to examine yourself in these two points.  But perhaps you are not into introspection! Somebody recently explained it to me this way, if I look at a quarter from across the room, it looks quite small. But if I bring it to with an inch of my eye and look at it, I can see nothing else. In other words if we concentrate on the faults and the difference with others,  we are going to be blind to the big picture.

But I also have to say, on the other hand, that I have learnt just as much,  if not more,  from people with whom I disagree. In cemetery  (ups I mean seminary) one Professor advised that I need to feel the weight of the other person’s argument. In other words I need to listen and listen proactively. Most of us,  most of the time,  are simply waiting for the other person to shut up,  so we can make our own point. In other words,  most of the time nobody is listening to anybody. But if we Christians, with the unity that Christ purchased on the cross, if we  cannot listen to one another,  how on earth are we going to talk to the world who is at war with us? I mean even if they are at war with us, we should not be at war with them. Not saying it’s easy!

In the end it's all about relationship, and with the world,  in this day and age,  we need to earn the right to be heard. But if we Christians cannot learn to listen to,  and love one another with the unity that we know (or should know) that we have in Christ  and that we are commanded to have …..  (Ephesians 4:3)  I am not saying we don't need work through our differences. Actually in my view,  we should commit to work though them with the ones God leads us to fellowship with.  But if we are not willing,  what sort of ambassadors are we going to be (2 Corinthians 5:20)?  In other words if we don’t learn the necessary skill in iron sharpening iron among ourselves (Proverbs 27:17), where exactly will we learn it?  Unity is not uniformity, and we need to learn to love one another in and though our difference. And we need to learn to chew the meat,  and throw away the bones.

Lord Jesus,  please help us to understand what are the non-negotiable essentials of the faith, and on what points we can agree to disagree.   Please help us, help me,  not to be wanting more to be right, than I am wanting to be obedient. to the command to be eager to preserve the unity that at incredible cost You purchased for us on the cross.  And Lord help me to practice what I am preaching here, in Your precious Name I pray Amen

Part II Interesting conversation

I bumped into same man I did the other day (Interesting conversations part I) and, for those who know me well,  wonder of wonders, I not only recognized him,  I remembered his name. He told me of someone he knew who was very accomplished, and that I had reminded him of his friend. His friend was now dead,  but that right up until the end of his life,  he had continued to learn (anybody would think I am old!). I took this as a compliment! I told him of some recent thoughts I had had, prompted by both by the oft repeated phrase in Proverbs “get understanding,  and about all get understanding,”  that and the deep waters I have just been going through. In particular,  because of some recent difficulties I had encountered in relationships, I was seeing the need to understand what lies behind miscommunication, and how my own issues tend to get mixed up with the other person's.  You know, for example,  the other person is angry, but not being willing to admit it even to themselves, they project their anger on you. In other words they   claim that it is you who are angry.  And then it goes downhill fast since your every action is interpreted as confirming what they think!

We got into who can you trust.  I see many who trust nobody but themselves,  and I told him that I had come to realize that I am the last person I should trust. I explained that in the break up of my first marriage I had murder in my heart,  convinced she was pure evil. So convinced was I that all these years later,  I still don't know if I would have done it,  if I thought I could have gotten away with it. After having my eyes opened,  and being convicted of my own faults,  I was convicted by the verse that says that the heart is deceitful above all and desperately wicked (Jeremiah 17:9). I was certainly deceived.

I went on to explain, that I now have a higher power who helps me with these things  (I said “Jesus” in the silly voice some of you know,  and I laughed).  I went on to say that I need this higher power because we don't know what we don't know, and the therapist I went to at the time of my  my 1995 breakdown told me that in the midsts of miscommunication we both know only about 10% of the truth.  So now in the midst of miscommunications I tend to ask God to help me sort out my side of the street. I then fess up my part,  to the other person,  even if they are not willing to fess up theirs. If I am still feeling misunderstood I know that most misunderstood person in the universe knows my pain and, at least in theory,  will give me the grace to let it go if He thinks I should, or to follow thought if that is the way He is leading me.

Father, it is so, so easy for me to judge others when it's me who is the problem. You Word even tells me not to judge because “You who judge do the very same thing” (Romans 2:1). It is interesting to me Lord,  that what modern Psychology is telling us,  You essentially told us thousands of years ago. You truly are the true higher power,  I and give You glory in Jesus Name Amen

When Tigger is a trigger!

Tigger, you know the beloved character of Winnie the Pooh fame:-

“A wonderful thing is a Tigger,
a Tigger’s a wonderful thing.
Their tops are made out of rubber,
Their bottoms are made out of springs.
They’re bouncy, bouncy, bouncy,  
bouncy, fun, fun, fun.
And the most wonderful thing about Tiggers,
Is I’m the only one, I’m the only one!

In one episode Tigger has bounced rabbit one time too many, and upset the apple cart. Rabbit makes Tigger promise not to bounce any more. Rabbit is demanding Tigger not be Tigger!

Have you ever met someone for the first time,  and instantly disliked them? I’m not talking about discerning of spirits, I’m talking about something in that person that triggers an emotional reaction to a difficult event,  or period of your life.  A trigger, is any stimulus that stimulates such a memory. This is deep stuff, but we can have cognitive memories, memories that come with words, or emotional memories, memories that come without words. An abused dog has an emotional memory, when it slinks away from its master’s stick! Jordon Peterson says that most people think that the purpose of memory is to remember the past. but the purpose of memory, he says,  is to extract lessons out of the past,  to structure the future.

Not everybody appreciates my sense of humour, I am not even sure I do! But apparently I am a tigger. I remember a dear friend telling me that my being tigger is not funny.  I told her “you don’t find it funny, but other people do!”  She just could not believe it! As we worked it through, as we are committed to do, this dear lady was able to process the memory.  She had suffered abuse as a child and had had a miserable childhood as a result. Her uncle,  with the best of intentions,  was constantly trying to make her smile, and she hated it. Something in me had triggered that memory. Fortunately our relationship was strong enough that we could work through it, and once again come to the understanding that the Lord opens up wounds in order to heal them. It was a perfect example of iron sharpening iron  (Proverbs 27:17).

Father, so many of us are somehow unaware that we are so deeply wounded by life.  There is a theology out there that says we don’t need to visit the past because it’s all under the blood. Meanwhile people who are hurt, hurt people because we operate out of our woundedness. Lord please raise up teachers to teach your church to deal with our issues that half the time we don’t even know that we have. Otherwise, we will never show the world we are Your disciples by our love. I pray these tings in Jesus Name Amen

An interesting conservation

When my soul is troubled, I like to walk. This morning I was walking the East Coast Trail that continues from  middle Cove. I was  sat on a bench the next cove over observing the complex motion of the sea around several large rocks that sat far above the surface. I had my notebook in my hand.  A family of hikers came by, and the man remarked that it was a good place to meditate. I replied that that was interesting because that’s exactly what I was doing. I explained that I am a pure mathematician, but the complex motion of the sea gave me a desire to study fluid dynamics which of course is applied Mathematics. And I said to him point to the waves, “what is fascinating here, is that there are equations that describe the motion here. And I have to wonder how evolution explains that!

He essentially mentioned that random small changes plus time leaves many things unexplained.  I replied that one of the things that it does not explain,  is why it actually makes sense to study the order in a universe that arrived here by pure chance (I did not mention that modern science started in the church and came out of the belief that God is a God or order so it makes sense to study His ordered universe).  “For example,” I continued “there is an interesting article by a man called Michael Behe that talks about irreducible complexity. He explains this in terms of a mousetrap. If you remove any one of the components that make up a mousetrap, it will not work, the spring, base, the bait. In particular, the fflagellum  that can be found in every single  single cell is comparable in complexity to an outboard motor, on a boat. In order for it to work all the components have to be come together at the same time. In particular its ability to reproduce as has to come at the very beginning.” He responded by pointing to the wonder of life coming from non-life, from the so called Primordial soup.

I said to him that there's another thing that is equally inexplicable, what scientists call the Big Bang. I continued by saying that the presuppositions of naturalism, which imply that we will eventually be able to explain everything in terms of natural processes, but in the end this boils down to saying “in the beginning nothing created have the everything that is out of nothing!” He laughed,  and said in that case I’m not a naturalist. He muttered something about higher powers,  but was very careful to point out he was not talking about God. I said to him “well what you mean by God anyway?” I then told him it’s probably time you caught up with your family who had gone ahead and of him. In particular I did not try to ram the gospel down his throat

Father, thank You for this gift to me in my troubled time. Teach us to talk to those who don't know You, and help us not to be over anxious always wanting to leave them with the Gospel. The good news makes no sense unless you know the bad news that you are a sinner on your way to hell unless you receive Christ's sacrifice for you on the cross. Holy Spirit lead us and teach us as we talk to a lost world. I pray that we will say every word You want us to say, but not one word more, in Jesus Name Amen

Fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14)

I was talking to a friend the other day, and I was saying that I am just beginning to realize how unique I am. My friend replied that we are all relatively unique. I told him take out the word “relatively.” In other words we are all unique, you are unique, I am unique. We are fearfully and wonderfully made!  One of the videos that was posted on a feed I am following,  sings about you and me being God's masterpiece. Praise God, I am God's masterpiece!  Hallelujah!  Now that may not be the way you see me, but it is the way God sees me. And, well nothing personal, but I will take his opinion over yours any day. It's not always easy to live this way, for me for a long time it was impossible!

You know humility is not about denying the gifts and the talents that God has given us.  Certainly we are not to think more highly of ourselves than we aught.  But look,  I am God's child, I am God's handwork, I am God's garden, and God don't make no junk! I love what Bill Johnson said to the worship leader who,  when praised,   said “It's not me,  it's Jesus.” Bill replied “It wasn't that good!” I don't think that actually happened, Bill is far too gracious for such a putdown. What I am saying though, is that while we must not think too highly of ourselves,  neither must we think of ourselves as worms – as one hymn would have us think (such a worm as I)!

A beautiful sister in the Lord just posted on a feed I am following “Praise God He created me like His image.” She is fearfully and wonderfully made, and so are you. So let's stop beating ourselves up. You would not (or perhaps I should say should not)  speak to others the way we sometimes speak to ourselves. On the other hand, too often we despise the flaws we see in others precisely because they are also ours,  and we are essentially engaging in self hate. It is probably more common than  we could imagine.  

Father, please help us to neither think too highly, nor too lowly of ourselves.  It's hard at times Lord,  when somebody puts us down. You don't expect us to put up with abuse, but when we react badly to such things it is likely that we have not learned to care more about what You say about us, than what others say. And You know we are wonderfully and fearfully made, for You made us! Help us with this Lord,  and we will give You the glory in Jesus Name Amen

A companion comparable to him I (Genesis 2:18)

Have you ever felt that people just don't get you?  I take your silence as a yes! I am only just beginning to appreciate the following small part of a prophetic word that was spoken over me in 2006.  I was being told that God was saying to me “I know you. I know you, I know you. I know every hair on your head ....” I think, and this is my opinion, that Adam and Eve in Paradise did not have sex until after the fall (Genesis 4:1 – see also Matthew 22:30). What I think, is that they had something so much better. I  know, it's hard to believe!

You see what I think, is that  sex was God's gift to fallen mankind to partially compensate for what was lost in paradise. And that if we use it in the way He intended us to use it, that is after we have left our parents physically and emotionally,  and after we have cleaved – covenanted with our spouse (Genesis 2:24), then it would partially compensate for the loss of true intimacy of which verse 25 is a picture.  But most of us have squandered and abused His gift,  and in the process developed sexual appetites that are unlikely to match the companion we seek who is comparable to us.  What that means is that one partner is sexually lonely, and the other left feeling inadequate to satisfy the other's need.  But if we both wait until marriage,  we will love one another on the honeymoon,  enough to learn to adjust to each other sexually.  Think of our sexual appetites in the same way we understand our appetite for food.  If we gorge ourselves,  we will stretch our stomach, and will not be satisfied with a meal others might even find too much!

Father, most of us blew it, I did big time. Forgive us Father,  and please redeem our dysfunctional sexual relationships. I know I needed a second virginity, but even then I had to get rid of the addiction, and that is and was a process.   We need Your help Lord. Give us grace to do our part in dealing with our side of the street, and we will give You the glory. Thank You Lord,  that You know us through and through, help us to understand that we are known and loved with a love that passes comprehension in Jesus Name Amen.

Fear not [there is nothing to fear],

..... for I am with you; do not look around you in terror and be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen and harden you to difficulties, yes, I will help you; yes, I will hold you up and retain you with My [victorious] right hand of rightness and justice (Isaiah 41:10).

I often hear people say “Everything happens for a reason.” It bother's me a little, and sometimes a lot. If your baby dies, and someone with the best of intentions in the world says this to you, it is likely to deepen your pain considerably.  I have always wondered how I would react if I lost a child. You do not expect to outlive your children!  What I do know is that it would severely test my faith in the goodness of God. You see I would still believe it is my mind, but my emotions would scream “Unfair, unfair!” And your statement would confirm he is unfair. Life is not fair, Jesus Christ crucified is not fair.  He never told us life would be a cake walk (John 16:33). Please be careful how and when you use this phrase.

I am going through some deep waters at the moment, and I am clinging to His exceedingly great and precious promises (2 Peter 1:4). One is that when I go through the waters they will not overwhelm me  (Isaiah 43:2). Notice that is does not say I will not feel overwhelmed (Psalm 142:3).  Feeling are often an interpretation of the situation that may,  or may not,  reflect reality. The difference gets us into trouble in our conversations, in arguments in particular.

A dear brother who is praying for me in my trial sent me the title verse this morning,  and the Lord underlined for me the phrase “harden you to difficulties.”  I am not saying I don't struggle, but I felt He was telling me that He is going to use the difficulties for my good (Romans 8:28) to prepare me for a greater ministry down the road.  After all it is what He did with Joseph in the Bible (Genesis 37-50). When I look at it this way it helps me to obey 2 Timothy 2:3.

Father, thank You that You have promised to go with me through the waters, and that You truly work all things together for my good. Like Paul,  with Your help,  I choose to believe that these light temporary afflictions are working a far more exceeding glory for Your Kingdom in Jesus Name Amen,

Taking some time out 1666 previous blogs to browse enjoy

Benjamin born, Rachel dies, Reuben's sin

The clan moves on from Bethel,  and on the way Rachel gave  birth to Benjamin the twelfth of the twelve patriarchs.  Rachel died in childbirth but before she did,  she wanted to name him Ben-Oni, the son of my sorrow. But Jacob names him Benjamin, son of my right hand. Rachel was buried on the way to Bethlehem and a pillar erected on her grave. Then “Reuben went and lay with Bilhah his father’s concubine; and Israel heard about it” (Genesis 35:16-22).

Ben-Oni means the son of my sorrow,  Benjamin, the son of my right hand. Ellicott  comments  doubtless, her feeling was that the life of her offspring was purchased by her own pain and death. Jacob’s name for him, “son of the right hand,” was probably given not merely that the child might-bear no ill-omened title, but to mark the preciousness of his last born son.

In spite of the fact that his family had followed his directions to put away the family idols (35:2), Jacob was a weak father. I am thinking about fear being the response to the massacre perpetrated by Simeon and Levi. We do not read of rebuke (34:30).  And here we read that he heard about Reuben's sin, not that he did anything about it.  My next quote is controversial “Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.” (Proverbs 13:24).  The Lord is David's shepherd, and God's rod is part of what comforts him (Psalm 23:4). As a shepherd himself David probably used his rod to give light taps to the sheep to keep them going in the right direction. The verse is controversial because it evokes the issue of spanking.  However, in the manner of Hebrew poetry, with the second stanza saying the same thing and elaborating, it is clear that the rod is talking about discipline in general. For one of my daughters,  a look was enough to correct her.

In Proverbs 3:12 we read “the LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.”  Jordon Peterson says that it is our duty to bring our children up in such a way that other people like them. This takes discipline! Peterson suggest dealing with temper tantrums by putting them in time out, and telling them they can come out when they are feeling better. We probably learn best from the consequences of our actions.  Responsible parents will make the consequences appropriate. When children  are adults we have no control over them, as demonstrated by the story of Jacob (verse 22).  Consequences we learn as adults are likely to be far more serious than in childhood. In any case some of my most precious memories are in the aftermath of disciplining my kids,  when I have taken them into my arms,  told them I love them,  and they have happily bounced back. We can learn a lot about forgiveness from children. Appropriate discipline helps children to feel secure, and to know where the boundaries are!

Father, it's less painful to leant discipline when we are young. Thank You for Proverb which is full of wisdom both for both children and parents. For some of us it feels too late, but it is never too late to pray for them and when we turn to You,  You have promised to restore the years the locus have eaten (Joel 2:25). In any case Lord help us to pray for both our children and our parents in Jesus Name Amen

Vows, alters and the Worship of God

 God appears to Jacob and reminds him of his vow  at Bethel on the day of his trouble when he had fled from his brother Esau. He is to build an alter there.  Jacob tells his family to put away foreign gods, to purify themselves and change their garments. His directions are followed and the idols are hidden under the terebinth tree near Shechem. They journey to Bethel and Jacob builds another alter there and calls it El-beth-el meaning the God of the house of God.  God appears again and says I am El-shaddi (God Almighty), He renews His promise to Abraham about the land and the nations that shall come through Jacob.  He also reminds him of his new name Israel,  and adds “Kings shall come from your body.”  Jacob sets up a pillar of stone; and he poured a drink and oil offering on it (Genesis 35:1-14).

The vow that Jacob had made was that “If God will be with me, and keep me ...... so that I come back to my father’s house in peace, then the LORD shall be my God” (Genesis 28:20, 21). He had tolerated idols in the house and he understood as head of the house it was his responsibility to bring the whole house under the influence of the Lord. God would later in the Law make it very clear that we are to put away all idols (Exodus 20:3, 4). Joshua would later declare “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”  The changing of the garments was symbolic of the purification, literally of cleansing yourself. There would be many ritual cleanings required later under the Law, and there were many things that made you ceremonially unclean (Numbers 19:11, 12; Leviticus 14:4; Leviticus 15:13). but it was never intended to be only external. Jesus condemned the Pharisees “you Pharisees make the outside of the cup and dish clean, but your inward part is full of greed and wickedness” (Luke 11:39).  So today while the liturgy can help a person draw near to God if it engages the heart,  simply going through the motions is what the Pharisees did and what Jesus condemned.

El-Shaddai is often translated as Almighty God, God of power and might.  The God we worship is not some tinpot god, nor some modern manifestation of an idol. He is the one who spoke and stars were flung into space (Genesis 1:3). There are so many names of God representing His many attributes and virtues.  Since we become like what we worship, it is important to put away our modern equivalents of idols and cleans and purify ourselves.  Jacob built an alter to worship God.  The New Testament believer is to worship God in spirit and truth (John 4:24).

Father, though You are merciful, it is better not to make a vow than to make one and not keep it (Ecclesiastes 5:5). Please expose any hidden idols or weaknesses, anything we might be prizing more highly than You. Thank You Lord that You seek our  worship, and that that is a big part of what makes us more like Jesus. When we, like Jacob make You  El-beth-el, we are in a real sense making You the God of our house and in essence declaring with Joshua  “as for me and my house we will serve the Lord” It is in His Holy Name we pray these things Amen