So what I am saying is that He is obvious, but that we “grow out of it,” for various reasons. I know for sure this is my own experience. When I was a child I knew God existed but then I turned to my own way, did things I knew were wrong, and in so doing “suppressed the truth in my unrighteousness” (Romans 1:18). During this period I regarded my former youthful knowledge as naive, but I needed to “become as a little child” again (Mark 10:15). This is not to become naive or gullible, but first and foremost to be open to admitting we are wrong, the same way a child will. I remember with joy my son in his emerging years responding to me with “guilty as charged.” How willing I was to forgive him, and how theologically significant that I have no memory of what he was guilty of (Isaiah 43:25). My point however, is that in general, its hard to admit we are wrong.
Part of this is that our consciences get hardened. The first time we do something we think is wrong, our consciences will give us a hard time. The second time not so much, until after a while we somehow or other have managed to silence our conscience altogether. At this point we can start to blame “those narrow minded Christians” for our having experienced guilt in the first place. As I said in a earlier post, what we do and what we believe are intricately interconnected. In my own case I know that if it were not for the consequences of my choices and the resulting pain, I would never have even wanted to come back. But in my pain and emptiness I did indeed start to “grope for Him” to find Him. And indeed He was not far from me. And as He promises He will, He did indeed give rest to my soul (Matthew 11:28-30).
But why do we need to seek Him at all? Why can't He be more in our face? I believe at least part of it has to do with free will and His unwillingness to force Himself on us. If there was no doubt that we would go to hell if we did not follow Him, where would the choice be? It is also (I believe) related to the principle that we are responsible for what we know, we will be judged according to the light we have been given. So that (out of mercy) He does not (usually) force knowledge upon us that we do not want. This principle is the reason teachers, who have more light, have more responsibility. James tells us we should not all be teachers, for ours is the greater condemnation (James 3:2). I used the word "usually" above. I am thinking of Paul on the Damascus road. But Paul, though misguided, thought he was serving God, not avoiding Him.
Someone once said that God hides for us, not from us, and this fits well with what I was just saying. However I think the main part has to do with the great romance. God is constantly wooing us to Himself. He is the great lover, the great romantic. And romance is about relationship not about cold academic facts about existence (or non-existence). Certainly He hides, or we would not need to seek Him. And His wanting to be sought is part of why He will not allow Himself to be proved or disproved (outside of a relationship with Him) by Science. I suspect He regards all our attempts to prove Him by rationality and Sciences as “God traps,” and He is far too clever to be caught that way! But He does want to be found. He is the hide go-seek-God. However as in all games, there are rules to be followed (see Jeremiah 29:13 and below).
When my grandson was much much younger, I took him to see the house I had just bought. I had not yet moved in, and there was not a single stick of furniture (or anything else) in the place. “Let's play hide go seek Grandpa, I'm it”. So I went and hid in the closet in the furthest room. “Ready or not, here I come. Are you in this room Grandpa?” 'No.' “This one?” 'No.' Eventually he came to the room I was in. “Are you in this one Grandpa?” 'Yes.' Remember there is not a single stick of furniture. So he comes to the closet and opens it. “I found you Grandpa.” What was so precious was the look on his little face, such joy, such delight!
What is my point? I don't remember exactly how old he was, perhaps two? But what was fully clear to me is that he had given this game everything he had. He had (age appropriately) put his whole heart and soul and mind into it. And he found me. And me? I was hiding for him, not from him, and I wanted to be found (for the joy of it). It's like this with God. He wants us (age appropriately) to put our heart and mind and soul into searching for Him. “You will search for me and find me when you search for me with all of your heart” (Jeremiah 29:13). And when we do, we will find Him, not because we are clever enough to figure it out, but because when we give it everything we are and have, He shows himself to us (see John 14:21 - Amplified Bible). And there will be joy in Heaven over one sinner who repents (Luke 15:7). He wants to be found by us, He is the hide-go-seek God.
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