Sins of the Fathers and resulting curses (III) Reality and honour

If coming to terms with the mistakes we have made is difficult it is often even more so for the children.  I meet a lot of people, especially in prison,  who are very angry with their parents, most especially the Dad! But the Bible tells us that life will not go well for us if we do not honour our parents. In Exodus 20:6 we read “You shall honour your father and mother."   It’s called the first commandment with promise,  and goes on to say “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth” (Exodus 20:12; Ephesians 6:3). In particular they say that six months after you get married your relationship  to your spouse is very likely to mirror the relationship you have with the parent with whom you most have trouble.  And if you don’t deal with the issues with your ancestors (not just your parents), not only is it likely to sabotage your marriage, you will likely leave the legacy of more of the same, to your children.

As a father and a son,  I have become increasingly aware of the baggage that was passed down to me, and the baggage that  I in turn,  passed down to my children (see Exodus 20:5,6).  I didn’t want to pass it on, I didn’t mean to, but it happened! I didn’t even know I had it!  Coming to terms with the reality that we receive negative stuff, and that we pass on negative stuff is difficult. It’s part of coming out of denial, but it is also part of what motivates me to bring everything I am and have to the Lord to be forgiven, cleansed,  and redeemed.  And this morning I want to emphasize  our need to come to terms with the reality of what we have received,  of what we therefore are likely to pass on, or have already passed on, and what the Lord wants us to do about it.

The Scriptures tell us that in many thing we all fail, but many times, for a whole host of reasons we don’t see it. Again, it’s called denial. But the fact of the matter is, that  if we want to have life in all it’s fullness (John 10:10b), then we need to enter  heart healing and freedom gaining sanctification (see the posts on sanctification from May). In the end you are the only one you can change. If you are  not dealing with your issues,  and in particular if you are not working towards honouring your parents, then it will not go well with you or your children unto four generations (Exodus 20:5 again). To say it again,  we are the only ones we can change!

Father, most of us have not been quick to honour our parents, and we turn now in repentance and receive your forgiveness. We  talk about tiptoeing round the elephant in the room, meaning a problem or difficult situation that, for whatever reason we don’t deal with. We may not recognize it, we may have tried to deal with it, but were punished and blamed for trying, and for violating the family rules  “don’t think, don’t feel, don’t rock the boat.” Yet You call us to walk in reality and truth,   and at the same time call on us to honour our parents. It is the only way to heart healing and freedom, and we need Your help Lord, we need Your grace, and we need Your mercy, and I am asking for it again this morning Lord in Jesus Name Amen