Knowing God, more on His presence

The Scriptures do not describe to us what the presence of God is like, but they do tell us that it is real. He tells us “I will never leave you nor forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5), so it is not His intention that feel abandoned (much to say here). Jesus tells the disciples, and us through them, that it was better that He go, so that Holy Spirit could come (John 16:7), and that He would be with us to the end of the age (Matthew 28:20). He invites us to come to Him and drink (John 7:37). This might sound a bit strange, but when, as is my habit I invite Him to come morning by morning, I imaging myself going “glug, glug, glug, glug, glug,” (sometimes I say it our loud!). And as I do this, the feeling of His presence increases. What does it feel like? Well it depends. What I was needing on Sunday was His promised peace, and what He gave as I spent time in His presences was a mixture of peace, joy and security, and it is very real!

Is this constant? Well no, and I cannot go on feelings. I mean stuff happens, stuff that grieves me. The old entrenched habit of obsessive thinking is not fully dead, and threatens from time to time to raise its ugly head. That is what was happening Sunday when I needed to leave church so I could wrestle it through in His presence. We are sealed with Holy Spirit at conversion (Ephesians 1:14), but we can grieve Him in thought, word or action (Ephesians 4:30), and though He will never leave us nor forsake us, nevertheless when we grieve Him, we can loose the peace and sense of His presence. It is the same feeling when we are temporarily out of sorts with someone we love. The difference is that it is never His fault, and as long as we repent, He will always welcome us back, no matter how grievous our sin.

It was this way of His dealings with us, that made me very teachable when I was first saved. His comfort and mercy and grace had lifted me out of a desolate pit (Psalm 40:2) largely of my own making. When I finally surrendered to Him, I felt comfort and grace within His “embrace” (His embrace was what His presence felt like). But my old sinful appetites had not yet died, and they would threaten to draw me away. It became clear that I could go back to my old life, I still had free will. But I could not go back and still feel His presence. So that when I would start to walk in that direction, the paranoia and the pain and the emptiness would start to return. I would ask Him what it was, and He would tell me, and I would repent and flee back into His arms, into His presence!

Father, since You are a real person (and so much more) then a relationship with You is very real too. And as with earthly relationships, if we want them to be significant and deep, then we need to keep short accounts with each other. Though I do need to obey, my relationship with You seems to be a mixture of that of a loving Father and son (Romans 8:15), but also of friends (John 15:5). And I feel loved and accepted and affirmed, and I love You so very, very much In Jesus Name Amen