Part 2 “My sheep hear my voice” - Negative self talk

A friend of mine was confessing to me, that he had been really mean to someone. He was forever telling this person that that he was a disappointment, a failure and a loser. He was glad his parents were dead so they wouldn’t see what what a disappointment he was. But he had suddenly come to realize, that these insults were causing anxiety and a fogginess in the brain causing him to be clumsy. Then when this clumsiness caused damage, my friend had then berated the man for his clumsiness. Suspecting I knew the target of this abuse, I asked him if it was appropriate to ask who he was talking about. And he told me “I’m talking about me, I have been saying these things to myself over and over for a very long time. And it suddenly struck me how destructive it is, how it has sabotaged my growth, taken away my confidence and kept me from moving forward!”

In spite of his negative self talk, I regard my friend as highly competent and insightful, and he has often helped me with things I was unable to do for myself. It was with the hope that it would help others, that he gave me permission to share this. The verse “Such restrictions indeed have an appearance of wisdom, with their self-prescribed worship, their false humility, and their harsh treatment of the body; but they are of no value against the indulgence of the flesh” (Colossians 2:23) comes to mind. I am very aware, this harsh self treatment is widespread. Frankly it's abuse, self abuse! We think it will somehow motivate us to self-improvement, but it is a lie. As the above verse implies it is no help at all!”

In some, perhaps many cases, this negative self talk is attributed to God. And this is totally consistent with widespread but false view that God is out to get us, that His is just waiting for us to mess up so He can condemn us. But there is “Now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1), and “God is love” (1 John 4:8). And both this false view of God, and the negative self talk needs to be repented of. We need to come before our gracious Lord and tell Him that we are sorry for believing that He is such a bully, and attributing such hate to Him, and for hating ourselves. Such negative self talk is certainly based on self-hate. If we are to love our neighbours as ourselves, then we certainly need to love ourselves! So yes we need to repent of hating ourselves.

Father, I was saying yesterday that if it kills, steals and destroys it is not Your voice. But the Devil is a deceiver and a liar, and if we think that we have totally escaped his lies, when we are deceived! So I ask You Lord to show us the lies that we have believed about You, and about ourselves, so that we may repent and believe the truth. And the truth is that we are Your beloved sons and daughters, that You are well pleased with us, that You are for us not against us, and that You are actively at work for our good in all things. You are a good, good Father and I love You Lord in Jesus Name Amen