The
following is an observation by author John Bradshaw “In a
relationship when one is open, and the other covered, both parties
finish up violating the other.” I came across this at a critical
time in my journey, and it helped me to understand some things I
really needed to understand in order to move forward. I knew
well, about violation from the point of view of one who is open. In
particular, some of the things I had confessed to others (James
5:16), had come came back to me as judgement and condemnation. And
yes I felt violated. What I didn't understand, was how it worked the
other way. Suppose for example, that for whatever reason, you are
covered in shame. You might tell yourself “If anyone ever found
out, I would die.” And what happens then, is when someone comes to
you in openness and vulnerability it feels to you almost as if as if
they are exposing themselves in public. And, especially if they are
close, you feel the shame you would feel were your secrets to be
suddenly revealed without your permission. You would feel violated!
When
Adam and Eve sinned they covered themselves with fig leaves and hid
from the presence of the Lord (Genesis 3:7, 8). Slim hope they could
hid from God! The fig leaves too were inadequate, but they
desperately needed something to cover their guilt and shame. And when
they clothed themselves with fig leaves, they were essentially
trying to hide from each other, and from themselves. Last day we were
talking about our attempt to hide from ourselves, suppressing the
truth in unrighteousness. This morning’s verse from Mark 4:22
continues with “nor has anything been kept secret but that it
should come to light. ” It is talking about the ultimate futility
of trying to hid either from God or from each other. In particular,
though we may be able to delay the revelation of our secrets, they
will not be hidden forever!
On
top of this, we have a saying in the Christ centred twelve-step
recovery group “Celebrate Recovery” that is relevant here. It is
“you are only as sick as your secrets!” It seems to be true, and
in particular when we are covered, we are not free. Also, even if
we can by some means delay the exposure of our secrets, if we leave
it until the last day, we will have no control over how they come out. In
the here and now we do! In particular, we can move towards obeying
the, by now familiar, command to “Confess you faults one to
another, and pray for one another that you may be healed” (James
5:16). Note that we confess to God to be forgiven, but healing only comes as we
confess to each other. We need to start by finding a
safe place, and it can be a challenge. We may need to make it a
subject of prayer asking Him to help us find such a place.
Father,
this is kingdom work. In fact, one picture we have of the Kingdom is
Adam and Eve in the garden before the fall. They were naked and not
ashamed (Genesis 2:25). This nakedness is not so much about no
cloths, but rather about openness, vulnerably, love, respect,
dignity and intimacy. And so Lord we pray this morning, kingdom of
God come, will of God be done on earth in our relationships, as it
is in heaven. And help us to have the courage to do our part, in
Jesus Name Amen
No comments:
Post a Comment