The elephant in the room (Part 2) Generational sins (Part 6)

Some elephants in the room are bigger than others, and some have been there so long and are so much part of the furniture, that we are no longer aware that we are tiptoeing around them. The Lord gave me a picture years ago, of how painful and disruptive a process dealing with these “elephants” can be. The potato patch in the garden had been left idle for four years. I had the use of a rotary tiller for four hours, and had intended to do a 20 x 20 plot. But the grass was so matted I finished up only doing a 10 x 10 area. And even after that, it needed a lot of spadework. The Lord then gave me a mental picture of a huge tree stump with a chain linking it to a huge carthorse. There were also several men digging around the stump all trying to extract it.

I felt the Lord saying to me that if it was difficult to till the ground after only four years, imagine how difficult it would be if it was left generation after generation. To mix the metaphors a little, it’s a little bit like pulling a tooth without anesthetic. I understood that if someone starts to deal with the issues, then they are likely to be violating the unspoken but strongly held family rules such as “Don’t think, don’t speak, don’t feel, don’t act, don’t rock the boat.” But to continue the dentist analogy, if the problem is not dealt with it gets worse, and though dealing with the issues is painful for a while, the long-term effects are beneficial.

Since all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23), and since the sins of the fathers are visited on the children when the issues are not dealt with (Exodus 20:5,6), then it is highly likely, that you and I have inherited family dysfunction at some level even if we do not recognize it (it’s all part of denial!). I only recently realized, that the men in the carthorse picture represent the fact that we cannot do this alone. When our actions cause others pain, even with the best of intentions, we are likely with the kickback to second-guess ourselves. We need support in order to push through. And this is why recovery programs that involve the fellowship of fellow strugglers tend to have higher success rates learn those who attempted recovery alone.

Father, I see this last point in spades in the prison ministry. I see inmates who really want to change, want to give up the drugs etc., etc. But their existing support group outside usually consists of those who are still using. And more often than not, we are seeing them come back time after time. It is not just with inmates of course, and I am asking You this morning Lord to help anyone who is beginning to see the need to deal with the problems in their life, that You give them the courage and the support they need to start the process of making the necessary changes. Help us Lord, like You did, to push through the pain to the promised joy (Hebrews 12:1,2). Thank You Lord for the support that You give, and while I certainly need others, more importantly I cannot do this without You. I would not have survived! In Jesus Name Amen