Cycles of grief

I was at a celebration of life breakfast this morning, for a brother who recently went to be with the Lord. And because we know that Dennis is with the Lord, the breakfast was a mixture of sorrow and joy, laughter and tears. Concerning those who go to be with the Lord the Scripture says “We do not grieve as those without hope” (1 Thessalonians 4:13). It does not say that we do not grieve, but that our grief is not without hope. I know the difference, because when my father died over fifty years ago now, I had no hope. I knew nothing of the possibility of seeing him again, and I was devastated, and inconsolable.

What a difference! It’s not only about the hope of seeing our loved ones again, it is also about receiving comfort from the God of all comfort. And He comforts us with a comfort that enables us to comfort others who have gone through, or are going through similar things (2 Corinthians 1:4). There was a lot of it going on this morning!

I was speaking to another brother on the way out, who has also suffered from a recent bereavement. We were talking about the emotional roller coaster these significant losses bring. The way I describe it, is that grief comes in waves. And when the grief is new and raw, the waves are high and frequent. But when, with His help, we deal with our grief in a healthy way, the waves get smaller, and further apart. They can however be triggered by all kinds of things. And this morning the grief in the room brought back echoes of grief from the time my mother-in-law died over thirty years ago. In fact each new loss seems to trigger echoes of all other past significant losses. And I am grateful again for the comfort that He brings, and that I do not have to face these things alone without Him, neither do you, it is there for the asking!

Father, nobody said that it was going to be easy, You did not, and it’s just as well because it’s not! But I want to thank You this morning for Your promise Lord, that on that day there will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain (Revelation 21:4). And once again I can identify with Paul that down here for me is all about living for Christ, nevertheless there is a strong longing from my home in heaven (Philippians 1:21). But also like Paul, I know my work down here is not yet done, so Father please keep me faithful, in Your precious Name Amen